Starting 2020 overseas in Japan, home to some of my favourite things including matcha, minimalism, noodles, and mochi, I thought I was starting the year off with a bang! Especially because I was finally leaving the USA for the first time in 2 years (except for a quick stint home to Australia). After getting home from Japan I was going into my second attempt at a winter self-hibernation. Intended to detox from people, alcohol, stress, expectations, and to allow time for myself, plus it is freezing outside during Chicago winter, so what better time! (I tried this the year prior and had great success). I was so proud of my self-hibernation results that I was excited to get out with people again. Then COVID happened. I was now going into a forced hibernation after already self-hibernating for a month, but this time I was truly alone.
I don’t like saying the word, alone or lonely out loud, because it truly makes me so sad, that I instantly cry. It’s such a strange feeling because this year I have felt so strong going through the struggles of 2020, but as soon as the word lonely comes up, I break down instantly. I am alone. Alone in a foreign city, away from family, in a studio apartment, with no plans to do anything but work and get through the day. I do love it here though, I’ve flipped all of the negative from COVID into a positive, as anyone should with the practice of gratitude.
During the first quarantine, I made a goal to re-do my website into something bigger and better! In just two weeks I redesigned my logo, built my own website, and wrote an about me page. That’s it. Eight months later I still haven’t written my first post. I have so many ideas on what I want to write about and share with the world, but I feel like I’m terrible at writing and can never find the urge to start! I need to get past that negative and share who I am through a website that represents me. The colours, the font, the logo, the style, the vibe, it is all me.
Eight months later, what’s changed? The end of 2020 is near, we are going into another quarantine, winter is starting, I just recovered from COVID after trying to avoid it and the great conjunction is happening next week. So with all of this alone time and the unknown around what 2021 will bring, I thought I’d push through the barrier of starting to write and just write. Hopefully, I will continue, I have lots of plans to share mostly things I love and what has helped me move through the challenges of today’s society, including recipes, wellness, mindfulness, lifestyle, fitness, and spiritual insights. Here’s to my first post, the start of a journey to a raw authentic self.
